A few days ago, a friend of mine asked me such a question:
What should I do if I meet someone more touching after being with him?
My heart is pounding at first sight and I really want to pursue the other person. What should I do?
When you meet someone more touching in a relationship, should you let go of your current partner? How to fall in love
When I first heard this question, I found that I didn’t know how to answer. Nowadays, it seems that we are increasingly living in an era where love is like fast food. When happy, they come; when unhappy, they leave at will. Love seems to have become cheap and unable to stand any test.
In a person’s lifetime, there are as many as a hundred thousand people of the opposite sex. Many times, we really can’t guarantee to love only one person for a lifetime.
Ultimately, people are all lacking in love. Throughout our lives, we merely seek a partner who is completely compatible in spirit and appearance to spend our lives with.
Later, when I got home, I thought about this issue carefully again. Most of those partners who can walk hand in hand through life in reality are not because they have found such a perfect other half.
On the contrary, many of them, when viewed by us, are not very perfect and do not seem to be a perfect match. Most of them have gone through the test of time, gradually transforming the initially passionate love into an existence like family affection.
The reason why some people are so obsessed with “meeting someone who makes their heart flutter more” is, in my opinion, a kind of affection that ends prematurely before it can be elevated to kinship. It cannot be called love. Whether it is love or marriage, both are “exclusive”. That is, the moment I was with you, I gave up all other possibilities.
If you still have feelings for another person, then you probably don’t truly love your significant other yet. True love is that you know he is ordinary and that you might meet someone better than him in the future, but you still love that imperfect him. When your heart is full, it can no longer hold anyone else. Thinking in this way, it is obvious that the relationship between the friend and her boyfriend has not reached that level yet.
If we look at this phenomenon from another perspective, just one glance makes one’s heart flutter. And what you see at first glance is mostly not the truth, but just your fantasy about a lover. It’s just that this person happens to meet some of the characteristics you expect a lover to have, so you find them attractive and fall for you.
Why does such a feeling occur?
In fact, the reason why you are experiencing such pain ultimately stems from comparison. When you feel that you have met someone you think is more touching, you must have already compared this person with your current significant other in your mind.
What you must know is that the comparison in this situation is not very fair. No one can be perfect. This person has their own charm, but your significant other must also have their own shining points. Otherwise, how could you have ended up together in the first place?
You are habitually comparing the shortcomings of your significant other, thus glorifying the newly met person and generating that moment of sudden infatuation.
So, in the face of such a situation, how should one make a choice and how to fall in love?
According to the above statement, since the current relationship you have is not love, you can choose to part ways with your significant other. However, there is a prerequisite: you need to know what you want and be clear about it: everyone has what they want, but not everyone knows exactly what they want. You can try to get to know the man who makes your heart beat, and learn most of the information about him, such as his character, quality, values and so on.
Then you are also very clear about what kind of life you want and what kind of man you want. So all you need to do is listen to the voice in your heart and make your choice.
There is no right or wrong in choosing any outcome. Love is love, and not loving is not loving.
But if you just catch a glimpse of someone’s good looks for the first time, your eyes are dazzled, your mind is obsessed, and you abandon what you already have without hesitation and throw yourself into an unknown heart, I can only say that this is not pursuing true love; that is foolishness.
However, what the editor also wants to say is that after the passion fades, there will always be a return to normalcy.
What if, on the premise of having a significant other, one thinks of breaking up when they see the person they have a crush on, and only sees the next person they have a crush on when they have been together for a long time? What should I do? Could it be another division?
There might be many more people who make your heart flutter in the future. Can you be sure this is the last one?
Even if you are with the person you have a crush on, can you really live the happy life you imagine?
There are far too many uncertainties among them. You can choose to calm yourself down first and give yourself some time. After this period, you may no longer have that feeling.
Many people would rather pursue a momentary passion than accept a long-term ordinariness. So, whether this is right or not is just a reference. Being together is a long-term matter for two people. No one else can make the decision for you; it’s up to you to make a careful choice.
